It takes a village...

We were so lucky when our oldest was born. My husband and I were in rabbinical school and we were in a large community of students and friends.

Most of our friends were young-marrieds, singles, and almost no one had kids. We were among the first.

Definitely having a baby is hard. The first one is a total shocker. Life changes. Those first few months, that first year are a killer.

David was born in November. I wrote and handed in my thesis proposal between his birth and January. I handed in my completed rabbinic thesis three months after his first birthday.

We rarely went out at night but we had a great co-op daycare center on campus. Our weekly poker game continued, almost uninterrupted by David's birth, at our house. We put him to bed at 7pm. Poker started at 7:30. Some nights we had as many as 25 people in our house. The baby slept on upstairs, unaware.

Today someone reminded me of all that. She has her first child now, almost one year old. It's been, as it is for all of us, a rough first year. They regularly speak about us, she says, and how we made it "look easy." We should have offered to help you out more, she told me, if only we had realized how hard it really was!

And yes, it was hard. But I have to say, I can't imagine doing it any other way. I'm so glad we "hit the ground running" as my husband likes to say, by having a baby before we were out in the "real world."

We were so lucky. Our child was passed from future rabbi to future rabbi...all the time. These people are my best friends in the world, they are my family. They were the ones who visited me in the hospital as I labored. (Imagine...the hospital was next-door to our school. At lunchtime, I had a full room of friendly visitors as labor progressed....can you believe it!?) I wish we'd all had our kids together. I wish I could have held their babies in their newness. Now they're all out there, having their babies, spread all around the country. I wish I were with each one of them, sharing their experiences as they shared mine.

I love my life. But sometimes I miss my friends and their babies.
Welcome to the world, Hazel Zahara. I wish I was there to kiss your beautiful little head.

13 Great Things About Cincinnati, Ohio

I spent about 24 hours in Cincinnati, Ohio, on Tuesday/Wednesday this week. We lived in Cincinnati for four years while we were students at Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion...it was fun to go back...and here are 13 things I enjoyed about re-visiting this city! (Okay, I didn't actually do or see all of this but these are all things that visiting reminded me of.)

1. Graeter's Ice Cream. Is there anything more delicious than their ice cream? I'm not entirely sure.

2. Habanero's, a local burrito joint that I loved. It's on Ludlow, in the college-y area of town, and it's still delicious!

3. Hebrew Union College -- this is where I went to school, and it was great to return and see many professors, current students, and the daycare where my son went for about 18 months, the Jewish Early Learning Cooperative (aka JELC)

4. The American Jewish Archives, housed at on the HUC campus. I haven't been in the new archives building and it was amazing. There is an incredible "electronic classroom" that is just spectacular. Huge screens, internet hookups, it's a techie's dream!

5. Did I mention Graeter's?

6. Cincinnati is the birthplace of American Reform Judaism. Plum Street Temple, built in 1866, is still an incredible monument to Reform Judaism's roots and a gorgeous place to pray.

7. The chili. Even though I really don't like it, it was fun to be back in the town where people do like it and eat it.

8. Kroger's grocery stores. There's nothing quite like shopping at Kroger!

9. Newport Aquarium. This is a great aquarium, small and not too complicated. Until the renovation there was nothing that really smelled fishy, which is the part of aquariums that I don't like. And a yearly pass was cheap and easy...

10. The multi-state nature of the Cincinnati area...it's very cool to fly into Kentucky and then drive into Ohio. Why do I think this is cool? I have no idea but I do really like Kentucky.

11. Um, I think I mentioned Graeter's before. But it's worth it again.

12. Adriatico's Pizza. Mm...and Dewey's Pizza too. Have you noticed that my experiences seem to be primarily culinary? Maybe I should have titled this post 13 Great Things to Eat in Cincinnati. hee hee.

13. You can never go home again (so they say), but it felt so nice to be in this small city, a city that I know so well, a place that just felt good. There are plenty of flaws in Cincinnati, but for me there are so many sweet memories. My husband and I began our married life together there in a crummy student apartment, my first baby was born at Good Samaritan Hospital, I learned and studied and created community with my friends, I bought my first house (which I drove by during my brief trip...), I was ordained at Plum Street Temple and then my husband was ordained there. I still have friends there, although many have left. It's good to visit again.

For more Thursday Thirteen, look here!